Friday, May 1, 2009

green is not my best color

Before I started reading blogs, and way before I even started this blog, I read a book about a guy who read the entire Encyclopedia Britannica. I liked that he had a goal, and worked through it. I don't remember how I found it, but right after that I found a blog about a chick who was working her way through a Julia Child cookbook. She then turned that blog into a book, and now Nora freaking Ephron turned it into a movie with Meryl Streep.

I never had the idea to cook all 524 recipes in Julia Child cookbook and chronicle my adventures. It isn't like she scooped me or slighted me in ANY way whatsoever, but last night when I saw the trailer, I was bizarrely envious that her blog got turned into a movie.

Seeing that ad has inspired me. Instead of sitting here pouting that I don't have a movie, I need to be proactive and find my own list to accomplish and chronicle and get a movie....I am not sure that running 5K's with a double barrel water belt is going to cut it. UNLESS, I decide to run a 5K in all 50 states....mmm.

Let's see...what else? The whole Kama Sutra? no. my sister and kids read this, and I don't think Nora E. is up for porn, plus I think CK is already doing that. Going to 52 zoos in 52 weeks? NO, someone else is doing that. Live in each of the towns on the top 100 places to live list for one month? That would probably get expensive. Eat only McDonald's for a month? Damn, been done.

I am out of ideas, so here is the thing. I want to do something list-like, fun, and inexpensive and fairly quick to get over with because I bore easily (in fact, I am almost over it already). In addition, it needs to be SO awesome that I get a movie deal. If you suggest the right one, and I do it and get a movie deal...I will totally cut you in and send you free movie tickets. and maybe a TGIFriday's gift certificate, so you could go to dinner. and. a movie. damn. that is a good prize.

Because I am a planner and I have faith that someone will send me the exact.right thing to do to get a blog/book/movie deal, I need to start narrowing down the list of who should play me. At least we have already established that Denzel Washington will play the role of Mr. P.

13 comments:

creative kerfuffle said...

i haven't even READ the kama sutra, but think i should. hmmm
:::racking or whacking brain for ideas for you:::
i will have to think about this one but i totally think a young bette midler or a young stockard channing could play you because they are smark-assed sassy women : ) and i like them both.
and, i get totally jealous and pissed when people come up w/ ah-ha ideas that end up making them money like blogging about damn cooking and it gets turned into a movie. really? dammit.

SoMi's Nilsa said...

Oh how I love this idea. So, I once saw a painter who would paint one, small canvas everyday. For 365 days. Maybe you should do something similar. Commit to writing. It doesn't matter what. But, it must be limited in text. Like no more than 1 sentence. Or 1 haiku. Or whatever it is. Everyday. That's cheap. And could definitely be expanded into a book. Go get 'em girl!

seplowingermany said...

Having read both books you reference and loving The Know it All and marginally marginaly liking the Julie Powell book, I think you should write about what you know and do... could be interesting to hear more adventures of your students and your quest to get tenured. You must have tons of hysterical and heart-warming stories to be told.
If you don't know The Pasta Queen blog, she also turned her blog about her weight loss quest into a book.

ps - after having read the Julie Powell book, I read her blog for a bit - very boring. It did however inspire me to read My Year in France, which is a biography of Julia Child in her early years, which I loved.

Anonymous said...

If i have the best idea ever why wouldn't I do it myself instead of tell you? I will only give you my second tier ideas like make art out of dog poop, or keep all your trash for a year....

tracy

Not Your Aunt Bea said...

If Denzel is Mr. P, then Mr. P better regularly start walking around the house butt naked because I want that in the movie. And maybe when your movie comes out one lucky reader (i.e. ME!) could meet Denzel at the premiere. I can't even think of an idea because now I am swooning over Denzel.

Hotch Potchery said...

um Tracy, didn't you see that I would give you a gift certificate to TGIFridays AND movie passes?

I have to say, so far, you aren't winning.

Anonymous said...

What? How am I not winning I have given you the ONLY ideas!

LiLu said...

Mmmm... Denzel...

Maybe eat at every hotdog stand in America? It'd take forever, but I don't think it's been done...

Jen L. said...

I have to agree with Not Your Aunt Bea about naked Denzel...tell Mr. P to get on it.

I'm going to think on this one, and I'll get Marcus to think, too. Is it just me or does the Julia Child recipe movie thing sound kinda boring to anyone else? (And I'm a foodie!) We may have to stage a fight scene between you and Mr. P to add some drama.

The only thing that immediately comes to mind is something I did while I lived in NYC. I did one new thing every single week. I lived there for four years and never repeated my new thing. I should have kept a damn journal. Sometimes it was as simple as visiting a different Starbuck's than my usual one, but it was usually going to a new store or restaurant or even taking a different route to work. Something like that might be neat.

I really like TGIFridays, so I'm going to think HARD.

tara said...

I had a nightmare that involved rotting old hot dogs and a crazy kidnapper who thought he was in love with me about ten years ago. Suffice to say I have not eaten a hot dog, or baloney, or anything close to either, since the dream.

Make a different spaghetti squash meal every week for the next year. Or widen it to all squashes. Pattypan, zuchinni, yellow crookneck, butternut, acorn... Side dishes, main courses, breads... Tons of possiblitites. Lots of squash recipes. Good times.

Jen L. said...

Ooh! Tara's nightmare made me think!
Are you a vivid dreamer? You could do a dream journal. I could make a freaky-ass movie out of some of my dreams. The other night I dreamt we went to a club and found one of our colleagues was moonlighting as the entertainment there. He was wearing a catsuit and singing "Hot Child In The City."
God, I need more wine...

Astarte said...

Hey, I'm getting ready to read a book about a guy who read the whole bible straight through!

Why don't you, um.... hmmm. It's hard to find a life-overhaul that isn't really expensive or time-consuming! Why don't you follow CK around and document her unemployment struggle on video? Then you would BOTH get jobs, and BOTH get to be in a movie?! I'm a genius!

Fatinah said...

you're so funny! I would totally go watch a movie about your blog as it is right now! The whole water belt saga was drama that rivaled anything I've seen so far this season on Grey's Anatomy!! ;-)

 
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