I am not good at slack. Cutting slack that is. Not for my kids, my husband, my students, my family and certainly not myself. I have extreme expectations and if they are not met, well you better prepare for the storm of bitchiness that will rain upon you.
My highschool kid has a 3.5 GPA that has earned him a great scholarship. I have to BITE MY TONGUE to not ask why A's and B's are in even amounts...why not a few extra A's? My college kid got a C in Economics last semester and that irks me to no end, even though, I also got a C in Economics in college and apparently that did not bar me from all future success.
About 5 years ago I did WeightWatchers fairly successfully, I lost 45 pounds in 5 months, and my exercise of choice was jogging. My body responds extremely well to running, and I was doing fantastic. Except I got plantar fasciitis and I couldn't run for awhile, and instead of doing the obvious and recognizing that my weight loss would slow down while recovering, I refused to cut myself any slack, and opted for the next best solution...gaining all that weight back, and 25 extra pounds just to show my committment to the cause.
Jump to yesterday. I got up and before I left for work I did the Couch to 5K workout for week 5, day 3. Warmup 1/4 mile, jog 2 miles no stopping. I did it. I felt great. I went to work, taught my classes, then met Mr. P at the gym where I did 30 minutes on the elliptical machine and my weights. All good.
This morning, I get up to go do my same Couch to 5K as yesterday, and after about a half a mile I could feel in my knees and my hip that it just wasn't going to happen today, so after jogging for 1.5 miles I walked the rest of the way home. I only did a 2 mile workout, and when I was getting ready for work I felt like such a failure. Then I started really thinking. Maybe I should cut myself just a little bit of SLACK. Dude, that was a 1.5 mile jog when that wasn't even on the radar just a week ago. It was a two mile workout that burned 399 calories in 30 minutes. TWO MILES. Why can't that be good enough?
If I can't do something PERFECT, then I don't do it at all. If I don't have time to clean my house that includes every baseboard, every floor, every cabinet, then I don't even bother with any of it. If I have a paper that won't work at the very best journal, I scrap it. If I do a Sudoko in pen and mess it up, I TEAR IT OUT OF MY BOOK AND THROW IT AWAY.
I need to figure out how to cut myself some slack and occassionally, even allow a mistake in PEN.
How about you? What are your perfectionist tendencies and how do they bite you in the ass?