I will smack you down with (PATH) words

There is a guy in my department that makes pies for everyone for Christmas. The first year, he sent me an email and asked when he could bring it by, but I am VERY weird about the presentability of my house and whether I could let a co-worker see it in a awful state of disarray, so I took awhile to respond at which point he apparently ate my pie. Then later he sent another email and by then my sister and her family were here and I didn't care to respond because I didn't want to have to try to schedule him coming by when my family was in and out and really? Family trumps work pie. Then he invited us to his house to watch the National Championship game, and I despise the team they were all rooting for, and to be frank, he is okay at work, but really quite full of himself, and I have people I COMPLETELY LIKE to hang around with outside of work. Then he invited us to his baby's birthday party which is quite nice, but just so happens it was when my sister was here a different time, and family trumps work baby party.

Then he spent a YEAR basically making a huge deal out of how much I "hate" him and "spite" him and all in fun and games, but really? I am sorry, but dude, it is WORK pie.

Then last year he brought my pie to work, he didn't invite me to do anything and all was good.

Then (when you are telling a story, do you put in "THEN" alot, because apparently I do) this year I got an email while on the cruise to which I replied, "Seriously, you are not going to believe me, but I am on a boat." Then we got home the 24th, spent the next 2 days with mom & family, then the 2 after that with dad & family to which we get to the 27th. Then I get news of my friend, we decide to go skiing, another friend was moving away (in the COMPLETELY LIKE category), so we got together for his going-away, and so last Monday was the first day I was ready for the general public.

So, last Monday I saw him in the copy room and he said "Hi" but wouldn't really look at me. I said, "Sorry, I just made it back" to which he replied:

"Don't hold your breath."

To which I immediately thought in my head, "Are you KIDDING ME? Like, I OWE him making free time to get a FUCKING WORK PIE that I CAN'T EVEN EAT?"

And, wait for it....THEN, yesterday I was on Facebook and saw that his wife posted pictures of a cake that my friend made for their kid's birthday. In the comments someone commented on how awesome the cake was and she posted, "I had a girl make it."

You HAD a GIRL make it?

That pushed my buttons. How condescending. You commissioned a fucking grown LADY architect to make you a gorgeous cake for way less than it is worth because she is MY FRIEND.

I mean, really, check this cake out:

So, you know what I did? Yesterday I saw on Facebook that her husband (the king of pie) was the leader in Path.words. I played. Guess who is in first place now?

TAKE IT.