Sunday, April 17, 2011

If the car falls off the track

I made mention of sabatoging myself on this roller coaster of health that I am on...I derail myself and let the car just plunge into oblivion, every.single.time I get even close to a good place for me.

Year before last, I lost 45 pounds in 5 months, and kept it off for nearly 2 years. Then, last year I ran a HALF marathon, and now I am struggling with 2 miles. I actually just started the Couch to 5K program completely from scratch to get back in the groove and to improve my speed a bit. I joined the gym in August and have NEVER gone outside of personal training. NEVER. NOT ONE SINGLE TIME. NOT ONCE. This gym has a movie room, spin classes, Body Pump, Zumba, tons of cardio machines, etc. I go to personal training, walk on the treadmill while I wait for my session...the whole while weirdly hoping my trainer WON'T SHOW UP. I have my session (because he always.shows.up.) and then I leave. I do this once a week. Since I joined the gym? I have gained 20 lbs. mm. Not really the impact I thought it would have.

OH, wait, there is more: I used to have fruit and yogurt for breakfast every day. EVERY day. Now I have a spicy chicken biscuit and Diet Coke, on the days I EVEN BOTHER to eat breakfast. I do manage to eat a good lunch almost every day. Then dinner? Pizza (but "just" a slice with mushrooms and spinach), fast food salads, wings/beer, you name it, if I want it, I have it. I blame Mr. P because he is a bad influence. WHATEVS, I have been married to him during many bouts of healthiness, this is just the phase where I let him dictate our menu. If I choose, he will oblige, but it is just easier to let him lead me down the path of ever loving fried potatos with cheese and jalapenos or puff pastry filled with cheese and delicious. Our water delivery guy QUIT coming to our house because it took forever for us to drink a thing of water, let alone 3....soda was the only thing flowing in our house. We had to dig out a bill to even find his phone number when we finally ran out of water.

So, where do I go from here?

On Week 1 Day 2 of Couch to 5K, with my jogging speed around 12 minute miles (I am normally 13:30ish). I will have personal training twice a week for the next 2 weeks to get into a routine--Tuesdays and Fridays. I will pick ONE class to attend at my gym this week. I went to the store and bought breakfast stuff, yeah, some of it is prepackaged (Quaker Oatmeal Breakfast Cookies, some yummy looking veggie omelet sandwiches), some of it isn't (Fage yogurt, fruit). Until school is out, I will TRY SO HARD not to have a spicy chicken biscuit for breakfast. I will stick with my lunches as it. Dinner? Tonight we had spicy grilled chicken salads, and the nights we are home (we have commitments FOUR nights this week...end of semester crap), we will 'survive' off of salad and pasta. Our water consumption is back where it should be...I will start my day with water, but have Diet Coke during my teaching hours, then back to water.

That is the easy stuff. The hard stuff? Dealing with why I push my car off the track every time I get SO close to getting where I want to be.

8 comments:

chezjulie said...

I look forward to you blogging about your Couch to 5K and training and healthy breakfasts. I always feel like you should get credit for all of the hard work and healthy living you did in the past, but it doesn't seem to work that way. I've gained back a lot, too, since BLBE2, and I just have to get back in the cycle of exercising and making better choices, one at a time.

Mrs. Irritation said...

Why is it so hard to make healthy, new habits and so damn easy to fall back into the bad habits? Two years of being "good" seems like it should be good enough to stick, right? Sigh. Good for you for recognizing you need to make some changes.

wannabeamy said...

I've fallen into the sausage biscuit and yogurt parfait from McD's habit. Ugh!!!!
I need to start Couch to 5k ... or something. Anything!

tara said...

Girl, I do the exact same thing. The only thing I know is that it is totally circular. The more I move, the less junk I eat. The more junk I eat, the less I want to move. It totally goes both ways. When I am active I barely ever want sweets and empty carbs. When I am inactive, I want the comfort and crave nothing but sweets and carbs.

It's not that we suck, it's that once we head backwards it is so damn hard to change the momentum.

Shelley said...

Age-old question...along with "why does it take me so long to lose weight but gaining it? Easy as pie!...mmm, pie."

Good luck - I have the same gym phobia as you, so know that you're not alone.

Nilsa @ SoMi Speaks said...

Don't be too hard on yourself. The past is history. You can't control it. But, you can control tomorrow. So, I love that you're taking real steps to right what you think is wrong. And you'll be back to racing shape in no time!

Lynne said...

Today is a new day and you can move forward from this. Congrats for taking the first steps to getting back on track. You'll get there!

Monalisa said...

Oh i was regular on my yoga, and i really was fit, until someone told me yoga could cause damages long term, I didn't believe it. But just for fun, i gave it a pause. It is still on pause. Maybe i'll restart tomorrow.

Nice blog :)

 
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