Friday, November 5, 2010

Why I shouldn't work in the mornings.

I am NOT a morning person. Luckily, I have a job where most of the time I do not have to be. I do teach in the morning twice a week during the Fall semester, but that leaves 5 days that I can get up at will. mostly.

Now that I have tenure I have been put on 5 committees, and wouldn't you know it...the committees are full of the morning people. One such committee met last Thursday morning, bright and early. This particular committee is very serious, it is the student discipline committee, and recommends sanctions with regards to students who have behaved in such ways as to violate the student conduct code of our school. (I guess I could have skipped the description, you probably get it.)

Anyways, I got up, showered and picked out my clothes. Khaki shorts (I call them shorts, but they fall below my knees, but not quite capris), a white shirt, and navy 'boyfriend' sweater. I got dressed, took the dog out, and headed to the meeting, stopping for a gallon of Diet Coke on the way.

I got into the meeting and we were going through some stuff, and I looked down at my lap and my shorts were pooching out in such a way that it may have sort of, kind of , well looked like I was a guy and was REALLY happy to be in this meeting. At this point I reach to smooth it out, and I realized that my zipper was down. AWESOME. Very classy, very dignified.

I tried to pull my zipper up and it was all wonky and caught up in the fabric and I was really confused by it all and trying not to get weird about it while the people in the meeting were discussing some very serious subjects. I finally scootch my chair back a little and fuck me.

My shorts were on INSIDE OUT.

yeah. I don't even know.


kilax said...

Oh. My. Gosh.

That is too awesome.

I am always putting my underwear on inside out or sideways. WTH is wrong with me? We need assistants to dress us!

Tammie said...


i am speechless.

Jen L. said...

Oh,gosh, bless your heart! I've put my underwear on inside out before. Once when I was young and newly in love, I only shaved one leg, then wore a skirt. FAIL.

The tag on this post made me giggle. I just was thinking of the "your menopause" story yesterday.

--V said...

I've put tops on inside out, but (so far) never bottoms. And one day last week I walked around all morning with a big ol' toothpaste mark on my sweater, right smack in the middle of my Mountain Range. Sweater was purple. White splotch was hard to miss. Unless you're me, that is.

Anonymous said...

Wow, that is really impressive!

creative kerfuffle said...

i swear to god i laughed out loud at that one. although i hate mornings too i would have LOVED to have been in that meeting w/ you. srsly. of course i probably would have been drinking coffee and then i would have laughed and it would have shot out of my nose and i'm quite sure that would have hurt.
what is a boyfriend sweater? i am clueless.

Anonymous said...

Ha ha ha! You made me laugh out loud with that one.

Brings back memories of one of my greatest hits:

Shelley said...

Oh this is priceless! Still laughing out loud; sorry HP! ;)

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