Less words Wednesday: Gardening woes

I have some weirdness happening in my garden party.

First, I have a mad digger who is digging holes in all my potted plants, spilling my expensive dirt, having no regards for plant babies or flower pots that I have had for 20 years. Bastards.

AND, I think Bonnie's Plant Farms sold me a WEED with my lettuce....the pink is the WEED, and the blue is what the rest of the plants look like...I planted them right out of the flat I bought of Buttercrunch (or is it Buttercrisp) lettuce...maybe it isn't a weed, but I got an awesome bonus plant, but I think I am purposefully and carefully growing an expensive weed.

Let's have a patio garden party!

The weekend weather was perfect to do outdoor work, so that is just what we did!

In July, I asked Mr. P for a raised bed garden plot as my birthday gift. My family pitched in, and yesterday it was realized. I love it so much that I get up from what I am doing and just go marvel at how it is exactly what I hoped it would be. The bed is fully planted with fall crops, and while it may not yield much, I get such a kick out of how a tiny flower with bees and butterflies fluttering about will all OF A SUDDEN be a tiny baby pepper or cucumber or eggplant.

My summer crops were a bit weird. Peppers? OH YES. Cucumbers? ehh...a few weird ones. Strawberries? 4. BUT OH MY berries, the absolute sweetest tastiest berries ever. And the strawberry plants that I thought were dead are coming back. Squash? Nada. NOT ONE. Ichiban eggplant? Scarce until the weather broke, and now that the temps are below 90 I have already eaten 4, harvested a grocery store size one today, and have 4 or 5 more growing. Apparently the eggplant do not love the Alabama heat like the peppers do. Melons? EPIC FAIL. Tomatoes? Grape, yes, and again, once the weather broke I now have maybe 45 blossoms, but not one regular size tomato all summer long.

Oh, I got sidetracked talking about the summer garden, when my point was to show you my fall garden party area. (I likely will not have a garden party, but I love sitting outside reading magazines in the sunny breezy gorgeous weather we have been having...and I call that my garden party.)

BEFORE: (now before you get oh so judgy about the hideousness of my yard, remember this is a rental!)

Way down at the bottom of the hill is Mr. P whacking weeds!

and NOW: TA DA!!

And the piece de resistace:

A different vantage point:

My summer garden...the frame thing is what Mr. P built so I could have all my plants at the apartment, and I still like it so I still have it.

It is kinda weird that we have all this set up in the front yard, but my back yard is all tree roots and shade. The "deck" and chairs were out back, but Friday night Mr. P and I sat out there with a beer, but Joe (the dog) kept wanting to be out front. We admitted we like out front better too...so we just said, "WhatEV" and put the garden party in the front yard because that is how we roll up in here.

I really love it, but now looking at the pictures---I am wondering if it is more really weird than kinda weird....

SO...anyways...

I am VERY good at growing peppers, of various sizes and styles:

However, I am less good at growing cucumbers.

what I did today

• Slept through the alarm set for 5:30am and managed to drag out of bed at 7am. I set the alarm so early because starting next Monday I have to teach a class at 8am and the heat makes it impossible to run at times other than 7am and 7pm. I like TV at 7pm.
• I weighed in DANGEROUSLY close to scootching up a decade. I immediately logged into http://www.weightwatchers.com/, updated my weight and made a note to self to get shit together. asap.
• Started week 2 (note that week 1 happened several weeks ago) of my half marathon training. AND AND AND, I warmed up and stretched before I ran. Pain free the first mile (well, my hip/knee crap, lungs? different question), then a bit of pain the second mile. Managed a decent time for me. Stretched again. Iced hip.
• Made a frappe with my new Mr. Coffee Cafe Frappe. YUM. (Impulse buy yesterday because I was sure that it would help me through said early morning class starting next week.)
• Watered plants. Fell in love with my baby cucumbers all over again. Tried to decide how many times we are going to have to have Thai food based on the 450 peppers that are growing.
• Showered.
• Wrote three blog posts and deleted every.one. of them.
• Quit the gym. OF COURSE, you have to quit by the 20th so you don't get charged an extra month. I bet they change the form every day so that you are always a day late. fuckers. I want to quit the gym!
• Changed my address at the post office.
• Went to Chick Fil A for lunch and to read to decompress for class.
• Taught an hour and a half class about writing queries.
• Taught an hour and a half class about accounting for corporate bond issues.
• Graded projects while eating a Fage 2% with Honey yogurt thing. I almost threw it away because it was weird. But then it got a bit warmer and blended and then I liked it...but maybe not 4 points liked it. I added some Corn Flakes. Did you know that Kellogg's Corn Flakes contain high fructose corn syrup? Yeah, I didn't either.
• Came home.
• Made HOMEmade salsa/pico. Tomatoes, red onion, homegrown jalapeno/serrano/habanero peppers, fresh corn, black beans, garlic, cilantro, salt/pepper, red wine vinegar. DAMN it is good. and fresh. and delicious.

Now I am waiting for Mr. P to get home from his run, and we are going to eat the salsa/pico stuff on corn tortillas with some refried beans and a bit of 2% cheese. We have 8 days left in this house, and it can't happen soon.enough.

OH.MY.GOD. I have the Bachelorette on and I think one of the dudes got a tattoo with her name on it....what the hell man??? psych.o.

How was your Monday?

EDITED TO ADD: My iPod had died, and when I charged it the date/time was funky, so it logged my run at May 5, so it isn't showing up with my Nike girl. My next run (Wednesday) will be there.

pshaw...I can make that.

So, we are in the midst of packing up our kitchen so that we can accomplish step's one and two of the worst moving plan in the history of earth:

1. Get Mobile Attic (this Thursday).
2. Pack most of our stuff into Mobile Attic.
3. Have Mobile Attic moved to Penny's yard.
4. Move rest of stuff into one bedroom apartment for 30 days.
5. Move out of tiny apartment into mom's apartment for 7 days. Repack some stuff and shove into mom's apartment. Throw rest of stuff away.
6. Have Mobile Attic moved to street in front of new old house.
7. Unpack Mobile Attic, paint bedroom Sea Glass (which is the new white, by the way).
8. Have refrigerator delivered.
9. FINALLY BE THE FUCK MOVED after 2 months of horrible, random shuffling around.

Anyways, today is the day I decided I NEEDED one more planter of watermelons, AND that I should find plans online to build my own adirondack chairs while we are staying in the apartment. And a gardening bench. Because of course, a tiny apartment is the perfect setting for an amateur woodworking studio. Also, I spent about an hour researching the cost of a weekend trip to NYC because I feel like I need to jog in Central Park, eat a chicken salad BLT at Carnegie Deli and eat fluffernutter cupcakes and Mr. Misty ice cream cones. All seems very reasonable.

Do you ever make unreasonable or weird plans that you are determined to see through because if you don't, your life might be completely ruined otherwise??

Oh, and I gained 4lbs this week. McDonald's TWICE. Pizza. Wings. Fried Chicken. No jogging. I am so lame, I have got to get my shit together, I am 12 weeks out from our first half marathon of the running season. YIKES.

Does anyone know where to get eggplant porn?

One of the things I did this spring during Moodfest 2010 was plant a BUNCH of plants. Peppers of every variety we could find. Anaheim. Tabasco. Habanero. Thai. Jalapeno. Green bell. Tiny bell. Yellow bell. Orange bell. Red bell. (Which later I read somewhere that the other colored bell peppers are really green bell peppers that have further ripened---so good one Bonnie plant people---you got me to buy several more plants!) I also planted Japanese eggplant, cucumbers, strawberries, zucchini, and tomatoes in two sizes, grape and regular.

Now, if you read my post yesterday, oh. you didn't? Okay, I'll wait.

Alrighty then. Now you realize that I am moving many times this summer, and of COURSE this is the summer I decided that I MUST MUST grow enough peppers to support the country of Mexico and most of Texas. I thought of that. I put them all in planters. Some of the hanging ones (4), one square wooden one, two window boxes, and a variety of pots that I found laying around the house.

They are all doing well (except most of my herbs died and I only got ONE strawberry), but now...I am having some eggplant troubles. Or I might be. I don't know. Here they are:

The last two nights I have come home and ONE leaf is completed wilted. Thoroughly limp. I checked again the next morning and the limpness was still there, so I pruned the leaf. (This happened on 3 leaves, over 2 days). I posted my problem on Facebook and my sister thought maybe my plants needed some porn. (ya know so they wouldn't be limp.) (Oh, are we the only people that always go to "penis" when the words limp, hard, or any other word that can possibly applied to a penis are mentioned? If so, then nevermind.)

I consulted TWO horticulture professors, got good advice with requests for pictures when the plant did it again. But, today? NO limp leaves. So while am not in immediate need for eggplant porn, if you are aware of where to get it...drop me a line.

Oh, and speaking of lines...check out this goose family crossing the street.